I love my wife. She is an eternal optimist, especially when it comes to my handyman skills. Time after time she gives me these "easy" household projects that the normal male should be able to complete in no time and without stress. I only end up letting her down over and over, and we both end up stressed out. Now I realize my wife did not marry me because of my "Bob Vila-like" quality. Actually, I think it was more my "Bob Barker-like" qualities that she found attractive. You see, I never get people calling me to help with their plumbing or carpentry, and there is a reason for that. When Home Depot says, "You can do it; we can help," I usually reply, "no, I can't". Please don't send me any nasty e-mails telling me to be more strengths-based, or that I just need to believe in myself. I do believe in myself. Part of believing in yourself is knowing what you CANNOT do. If you want an aria from Handel's Messiah sung, I can do that. You need guitar player your band, give me a call. You want a strongly worded letter in defense of your cause, I'm your man. You want a new window installed, I have a friend who is a contractor.
The problem is that I really want to have some of those handyman skills. I enjoy watching "This Old House", "Home Again", and the myriad of other home improvement shows on television. Those shows make home improvement look so easy. It's not. For instance, there was the time my wonderful wife wanted me to hang a border in the nursery before our first daughter was born. I didn't bother to read the instructions because it was border, how hard can it be. Thus, I missed the key phrase "cut into manageable pieces". I tried to hang the entire roll at once by myself, and it was a disaster. My mother-in-law was in town during this event and to this day, she still says she has never seen me as mad. I don't use profanity, but I did make up a few words and let them fly with vigor.
Then, today, my lovely wife asked me to strip the caulk out of our bathtub and replace it. Most guys would be able to handle that in the time it time it takes for Chuck Norris to catch the bad guys on an episode of "Walker, Texas Ranger" and still have time to see him roundhouse kick the bad guy at the end. Me, on the other hand, ended up breaking three tools, making a mess, and using a few of those made up swear words. I will also be calling someone who knows what they are doing for help, which is what I should have done in the first place. But, in the mean time, I will have to shower in our girls' bathroom, because our tub doesn't have any caulk around the seams.
In spite of my home improvement woes, I take solace in the knowledge there is one project which I am actually quite good. I can hang and mud drywall with the best of them. I don't know why the good Lord gifted me with this skill, but he did. Beyond that, however, I will GOLF for food!
Peace.
Bill
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
White death is fun!
When I was a child in school there were two words that would send more joy, more glee, more happiness into the heart of every child..."snow day". I loved getting a snow day. I even recall one year, I believe it was 1977, when we had 2 weeks of snow days because we had about 2 feet of snow. In some parts of the country, 2 feet of snow is just normal winter day; in Portsmouth, OH 2 feet of snow shuts down the city. As a kid there is no better feeling that waking up to a fresh, thick blanket of snow, checking the radio or television for your school's name, leaping for glee when you see it, and heading back to bed for 2 hours.
I loved not having to worry about homework (not that I EVER did), and heading out into the beautiful carpet of white and playing until your toes turned blue. The house I grew up in had a sloped back yard that was perfect for sledding. It was not a particularly long track, but it was challenging. There was a stone wall at the bottom, with a door about three feet wide,that emptied into an alley. There were also stepping stones all the way down our "track", and if the snow was not deep enough, they would throw you off course and into the wall. So, our track started at the chain linked gate at the top and ended at the alley, and had enough curves in the run to make it interesting. By the end of the day, my friend and I usually had a nice little toboggan course, and some fresh bruises because we didn't always get past that stone wall. I loved snow days. Playing football, sledding, building forts and having snowball fights, then finishing it all off with a round of Swiss Miss Instant Cocoa. Those were the days.
However, now that I am grown and have children of my own, I have a much different view of snow days. While I still enjoy snow, snow days are more of a nuisance than a joy. Snow days mean that someone has to be home with the kids, or a sitter has to be found at the last minute. Sometimes my wife, who is a teacher, does not have a snow day when the girls do, which can be a problem. I work from home, so if I have no meeting to attend, this is usually not a problem. But if I have scheduled appointments, then we have to scramble. Furthermore, snow days mean that my kids will want to go out and play in the snow, come back in wet and cold and want some Swiss Miss Instant Cocoa. Which, again is no problem if their mother is home, but still disrupts my workday. Then someone has to deal with those wet, cold clothes and help the kiddos warm up. And since they were only outside for about 30 minutes, they spend the rest of the time fussing and fighting inside.
Snow days for kids are great. Snow days for adults, well, let's just say we wish we could be kids again. Don't get me wrong, I truly love my children. They are a precious gift from God. Yet, the longer I am a parent, the more appreciation I have for what my own mother did for me. Thanks, Mom.
Peace.
Bill
I loved not having to worry about homework (not that I EVER did), and heading out into the beautiful carpet of white and playing until your toes turned blue. The house I grew up in had a sloped back yard that was perfect for sledding. It was not a particularly long track, but it was challenging. There was a stone wall at the bottom, with a door about three feet wide,that emptied into an alley. There were also stepping stones all the way down our "track", and if the snow was not deep enough, they would throw you off course and into the wall. So, our track started at the chain linked gate at the top and ended at the alley, and had enough curves in the run to make it interesting. By the end of the day, my friend and I usually had a nice little toboggan course, and some fresh bruises because we didn't always get past that stone wall. I loved snow days. Playing football, sledding, building forts and having snowball fights, then finishing it all off with a round of Swiss Miss Instant Cocoa. Those were the days.
However, now that I am grown and have children of my own, I have a much different view of snow days. While I still enjoy snow, snow days are more of a nuisance than a joy. Snow days mean that someone has to be home with the kids, or a sitter has to be found at the last minute. Sometimes my wife, who is a teacher, does not have a snow day when the girls do, which can be a problem. I work from home, so if I have no meeting to attend, this is usually not a problem. But if I have scheduled appointments, then we have to scramble. Furthermore, snow days mean that my kids will want to go out and play in the snow, come back in wet and cold and want some Swiss Miss Instant Cocoa. Which, again is no problem if their mother is home, but still disrupts my workday. Then someone has to deal with those wet, cold clothes and help the kiddos warm up. And since they were only outside for about 30 minutes, they spend the rest of the time fussing and fighting inside.
Snow days for kids are great. Snow days for adults, well, let's just say we wish we could be kids again. Don't get me wrong, I truly love my children. They are a precious gift from God. Yet, the longer I am a parent, the more appreciation I have for what my own mother did for me. Thanks, Mom.
Peace.
Bill
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
My secret struggle
Hi, my name is Bill. I am an adult with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD). I believe I have been dealing with this condition for most of my life, but lately I have really been battling many of the challenges that accompany ADD. These include struggles with organization, remembering things, timeliness, and more. I am a right-brained thinker in a left-brained world and often feel out of place and lost. My mind feels like it is in a fog most of the time and I am tired of it. I have developed coping strategies through the years that help me to survive in a left-brained world and be a functional member of society. However, I want to do more than just survive and function, I want to thrive.
In a book I am reading called, 4 Weeks to an Organized Life with AD/HD by Jerry Freed and Joan Shapiro, the put it this way: "If you don't have ad/hd you do things because they are important. If you do have ad/hd, you do things because they are interesting." When I read that statement a window opened to my soul. That describes most of my adult life. The things I do well, I do because the interest me and I focus on doing it right. It is the other areas of my life that don't interest me where I struggle. Everyone has things that they have to do, that they do not want or like to do. However, for someone with ADD, the problem becomes that they will start a project, quickly lose interest and not get back to it right away, if ever.
If you do not have ADD, it may be very difficult for you to understand and empathize with someone who does. I will try to help. One of my favorite television shows in recent years is a show on NBC called Chuck. The main character, oddly enough named "Chuck", is an unwilling secret agent who has government secrets stuck in his head. When he sees something that causes him to "flash" on an object, hundreds of images go through his head in a few seconds and give him the knowledge he needs for that particular mission. I bring this up because when Chuck flashes and the images go through his head, that is the best way I can think of to describe what is going through a person with ADD's mind all the time. I have all these thoughts and images running rampant in my head and have no way to slow them down or organize them in a rational manner. As you can imagine it makes it hard to focus in certain situations. This also contributes to a lack of organization because even when I make a list of things to do, I will forget to look at my list or even forget where I put it.
There are medications available to relieve the symptoms of ADD and I have tried a few. A couple were too strong and did not help, and others have side effects that I could not handle. However, I am planning to talk to my doctor and see if there are any other alternatives available. In the meantime, I have been effectively using Mountain Dew to treat my symptoms.
I am writing this not for your pity or sympathy. My goal is to create awareness. There are many people in this world who struggle with this as I do everyday. All my life I have been told that I am lazy. I have been called an underachiever. I have been asked "What's wrong with you?" The truth is, nothing is wrong with me, my brain is just wired differently. I am not lazy, as a matter of fact, I work very hard. And I have achieved many wonderful things in my life, a college degree, a graduate certificate, a decent golf game, a good job, and a beautiful family. Nonetheless, I have struggles and challenges to meeting my goals that many people do not have, and for this I am often misunderstood. The Bible tells us that we are all "fearfully and wonderfully made." I know that God does not create accidents and for this reason my life has purpose. I would ask for a little understanding as well. And if you think of it, say a small prayer for me as I seek answers and organization in my life.
Peace.
In a book I am reading called, 4 Weeks to an Organized Life with AD/HD by Jerry Freed and Joan Shapiro, the put it this way: "If you don't have ad/hd you do things because they are important. If you do have ad/hd, you do things because they are interesting." When I read that statement a window opened to my soul. That describes most of my adult life. The things I do well, I do because the interest me and I focus on doing it right. It is the other areas of my life that don't interest me where I struggle. Everyone has things that they have to do, that they do not want or like to do. However, for someone with ADD, the problem becomes that they will start a project, quickly lose interest and not get back to it right away, if ever.
If you do not have ADD, it may be very difficult for you to understand and empathize with someone who does. I will try to help. One of my favorite television shows in recent years is a show on NBC called Chuck. The main character, oddly enough named "Chuck", is an unwilling secret agent who has government secrets stuck in his head. When he sees something that causes him to "flash" on an object, hundreds of images go through his head in a few seconds and give him the knowledge he needs for that particular mission. I bring this up because when Chuck flashes and the images go through his head, that is the best way I can think of to describe what is going through a person with ADD's mind all the time. I have all these thoughts and images running rampant in my head and have no way to slow them down or organize them in a rational manner. As you can imagine it makes it hard to focus in certain situations. This also contributes to a lack of organization because even when I make a list of things to do, I will forget to look at my list or even forget where I put it.
There are medications available to relieve the symptoms of ADD and I have tried a few. A couple were too strong and did not help, and others have side effects that I could not handle. However, I am planning to talk to my doctor and see if there are any other alternatives available. In the meantime, I have been effectively using Mountain Dew to treat my symptoms.
I am writing this not for your pity or sympathy. My goal is to create awareness. There are many people in this world who struggle with this as I do everyday. All my life I have been told that I am lazy. I have been called an underachiever. I have been asked "What's wrong with you?" The truth is, nothing is wrong with me, my brain is just wired differently. I am not lazy, as a matter of fact, I work very hard. And I have achieved many wonderful things in my life, a college degree, a graduate certificate, a decent golf game, a good job, and a beautiful family. Nonetheless, I have struggles and challenges to meeting my goals that many people do not have, and for this I am often misunderstood. The Bible tells us that we are all "fearfully and wonderfully made." I know that God does not create accidents and for this reason my life has purpose. I would ask for a little understanding as well. And if you think of it, say a small prayer for me as I seek answers and organization in my life.
Peace.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
I'll do better, I promise...
Sorry I haven't written anything for a couple of weeks. I have been rather busy and struggling with some personal issues. I will try to do better and at least post something every other day. But can't promise. Thanks for reading.
Bill
Bill
The Dark Side of the News
The evening news is an interesting institution in American society. I mostly watch the news for the weather, sports and occasional stories that pique my interest. Yet, for the most part the evening news is gloom and doom, death and destruction, delivered by beautiful smiling people. I understand the purpose and necessity of the evening news. What I don't understand is why the news must always be so negative. In my line of work we try to be strengths-based, always looking for the positive in a situation. But the news simply reports the ugly and negative. Almost every night they report on someone who was shot, or a house that burned down, or some other tragedy. I am convinced that there is one station in Cincinnati that is not happy unless all of their viewers are scared to leave their home.
Just once, I would like to turn on a newscast and here this: "While we have had some bad news in our community today, we have decided to share positive stories that promote the good on tonight's broadcast." That doesn't happen because tragedy means ratings. I have often wondered what would happen if just one station decided to promote positive stories instead of crime and death. Would they see a spike in ratings? Or would they run out of stories before the end of the first week?
It was interesting this week when the plane landed in the Hudson River in New York. This was truly an amazing story with a pilot that was rightfully called a hero. However, because no one died or was seriously injured, the newscasts had to focus on the positive side of this story. It was fascinating to watch this story develop. The events that took place showed the skill of the pilot. As I flipped from station to station watching the coverage, a couple kept reminding us of what "could" have happened. They could have hit the bridge, or they could have landed in downtown New York, or the plane could have broken up on impact with the water. None of which did happen, but we have to talk about some destruction on the news, even if it is "could-have-been".
Do not misunderstand, I know that these people are simply doing their job. I would just like to hear more about the positive aspects of society once in a while. Even if they could promise one positive story for every negative, as a balance would be nice. Alas, I do not believe that will happen. But we can hope.
Good night, Chet. Good night, David.
Peace.
Just once, I would like to turn on a newscast and here this: "While we have had some bad news in our community today, we have decided to share positive stories that promote the good on tonight's broadcast." That doesn't happen because tragedy means ratings. I have often wondered what would happen if just one station decided to promote positive stories instead of crime and death. Would they see a spike in ratings? Or would they run out of stories before the end of the first week?
It was interesting this week when the plane landed in the Hudson River in New York. This was truly an amazing story with a pilot that was rightfully called a hero. However, because no one died or was seriously injured, the newscasts had to focus on the positive side of this story. It was fascinating to watch this story develop. The events that took place showed the skill of the pilot. As I flipped from station to station watching the coverage, a couple kept reminding us of what "could" have happened. They could have hit the bridge, or they could have landed in downtown New York, or the plane could have broken up on impact with the water. None of which did happen, but we have to talk about some destruction on the news, even if it is "could-have-been".
Do not misunderstand, I know that these people are simply doing their job. I would just like to hear more about the positive aspects of society once in a while. Even if they could promise one positive story for every negative, as a balance would be nice. Alas, I do not believe that will happen. But we can hope.
Good night, Chet. Good night, David.
Peace.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
King for the weekend!
Sometimes we need to slow down and take time to rest. Our bodies need time to relax, recoup, and recover from the stresses that come our way everyday. Naturally, the best way to handle this would be to schedule some time to take a nice vacation to somewhere warm, or just stay home and relax and read a book. However, there are times when nature takes over and tells you, in a not so subtle way, that you will be taking a few days off, whether you want to or not. I had such a break beginning around 4 am on Friday. My little break came in the form of some sort of stomach flu. I did not really need a break. I did not want a break. But, I took a break.
Now, dear reader, do not fear, I will not share all of the gruesome details with you, but let's just say I was not a well person. I should have seen this coming as my youngest daughter had experienced a similar illness earlier in the week, and when she is sick, she wants daddy. Thus, I was with her most of the time receiving her germs.
I hate to puke and will avoid it at all costs. Yet, there is a time during your illness when you know that puking is inevitable, and you might just feel better if you give in. So, I gave in. I didn't feel better. So, I gave in again. And again. Eventually, when one is in such a state, you reach a point where there is nothing left in your stomach to expel but your body continues to try and expel nonetheless. One would think that the body should have a a sensor that tells the "reverse mode" that the tank is empty. Fortunately, this was only a minor portion of the experience.
I am feeling much better now, but my weekend was one I do not wish to repeat anytime soon. I hope you stay well.
Peace.
Bill
Now, dear reader, do not fear, I will not share all of the gruesome details with you, but let's just say I was not a well person. I should have seen this coming as my youngest daughter had experienced a similar illness earlier in the week, and when she is sick, she wants daddy. Thus, I was with her most of the time receiving her germs.
I hate to puke and will avoid it at all costs. Yet, there is a time during your illness when you know that puking is inevitable, and you might just feel better if you give in. So, I gave in. I didn't feel better. So, I gave in again. And again. Eventually, when one is in such a state, you reach a point where there is nothing left in your stomach to expel but your body continues to try and expel nonetheless. One would think that the body should have a a sensor that tells the "reverse mode" that the tank is empty. Fortunately, this was only a minor portion of the experience.
I am feeling much better now, but my weekend was one I do not wish to repeat anytime soon. I hope you stay well.
Peace.
Bill
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